Newsletter #292 - "I'm Good With Crypto"

Hey Shitcoiners,

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Before we get stuck into this week’s edition, tune into the latest episode of Wage Cucking With Jmo! On his comeback episode, Jmo answered the questions you have been dying to ask. Ethena, airdrops and plenty more. Don’t miss it.

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We apologize for our tardiness this week. The Shitcoin.com team is in Istanbul! If you are at Solana Crossroads, head over to the SideShift.ai booth and say hello.

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Now to the news. With the presidential election just around the corner, crypto is coming into the conversation. Trump is good with it.

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And he wants crypto businesses to stay in the US. This man is giving the people what they want!

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Nic thinks the vote for American’s is a no brainer.

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While Trump was quite careful with his words, the commencement speaker at Ohio State was the opposite. This man is shilling his bags in the literal arena.

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Here’s some cope for you. Schiff thinks we still live in our parents basement. While he might be right about that, he’s wrong that we don’t have money for physical goods and services. We have been buying ramen and tendies for years.

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The mental gymnastics on display here is quite something. This is who you trust with your money.

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Trump mentioned the SEC and Gensler one of the videos earlier on in this newsletter. They are going after Robinhood for with some unrealistic requests. RIP.

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It’s not looking good for the democrats.

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Mark Cuban took his chance to tell Gary exactly what he thinks of him. He won’t be invited to a Mavs game anytime soon!

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Oh, Gary.

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It’s also not looking that great for Ryan Salame. The former FTX man has forfeited his house in the Bahamas. He is due to be sentenced on May 28th.

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This is an unconfirmed report, but life does really come at you fast.

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Imagine you got access to a bros password manager and instead of heading straight to his exchange accounts, you decide to indulge in a little Pornhub. Some hackers are built different.

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Be careful out there anons. Don’t get phished.

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Continuing our on this trail of thought, Paolo confirmed that there was no Bitfinex database breach. No shenganigans detected. Phew.

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Binance have supposedly caught DWF Labs manipulating markets. The market making firm allegedly wash traded over $300M in 2023. Yikes.

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Imagine this, you are so deep in DeFi that you no longer have any idea where your money is.

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Wait a minute…

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You could have had it all, but ultimately you will have nothing and will you be happy.

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This isn’t that complicated my bros. Instead of pretending to be right of the bell curve, you could have just bought memecoins instead. This guy is winning.

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