Hi Shitcoiners,
Tough week? If the markets are getting you down, we have just the ticket. This week’s newsletter is packed with the latest news, drama and spicy memes. Let’s kick this one off with a reminder of how quickly things can change.
The charts aren’t looking great but if you want a dose of hopium, here’s the latest from MicroStrategy.
You were long term bullish a month ago. Don’t let a few bad weeks shake you out. The past doesn’t always predict the future, but there’s no harm in dropping some prayers to our Lord and Saviour Satoshi in hopes of a repeat.
Arthur published his latest essay. This is some high energy bull posting. Buy the fucking dip!
As Arthur’s essay highlighted, the US is trying it’s best to control the rest of the world. They also want a firm grip on how things are running on home soil. Here’s an interview with Dave Ripley where he runs through the regulatory struggles an exchange in the US faces.
While on the topic of exchanges, an intern had a moment to forget once again. RIP Binance intern.
We will just leave this here.
We wonder if that intern will do a press tour in the future to talk us through the rationale. He can get tips from Dave Abner on how to go about it.
As memecoins still capture the attention of many, rumours circulated that “DJT”, a new Trump-related coin may actually be backed by Trump himself.
Pharma bro Martin Shkreli was very vocal early on. He was convinced that Trump gave his consent.
Random, non-crypto accounts we have never heard of started supporting the claim.
But as expected, many were skeptical. Alex Wice threw down a $1m bet that it was fake and then out of nowhere, GCR emerged to really throw down the gauntlet. This is the shit we live for.
Martin created a space and dropped some bombs. He claimed that he launched the coin with Barron Trump and others. Those are some big statements, Martin!
The rumour mill began to churn. Retar dio.
Alex Wice here with the fighting talk.
Some great 4D chess might be going on, gg.
The inner-degen might have been telling you to take a punt, but there was a way to trade this like an adult. You probably did nothing but just know you could have. No degeneracy required.
With the market cap climbing into the hundreds of millions, we needed answers. Arkham put up a bounty for information.
We could never have guessed who would be the man to dish the dirt. Zach doesn’t miss.
Shkreli is still saying it’s real, but Arkham thought the evidence presented by Zach was enough. Enjoy the $150,000 sir.
We still have plenty of questions and top of that list is, why didn’t they consult with Ansem first?
The wassie may have the answer.
One interesting takeaway from this whole debacle was that GCR thinks we are still in a bull market. We will take it.
Kraken have had a busy week. A “security researcher” submitted a bug bounty. But instead of just testing this with a few dollars, they decided to withdraw $3m and keep the funds hostage. The tweet thread that followed that post is telling. No names were mentioned.
However, Certik would announce to the world that it was in fact them who had made the withdrawals.
They tried to clear their name.
But the blockchain doesn’t lie and supposedly they have moved the funds through Tornado. Yikes!
Sending our thoughts and prayers.
If there is one silver lining at least the people who give out those audits actually know how to hack.
It was a big week of airdrops. ZkSync was up first. Irene is going to McDonald’s!
While others are leaving the community as their efforts were not rewarded.
After insane levels of cluster analysis, ZRO finally dropped.
To claim you had to make a small donation. Some were not impressed.
The donation amount is minimal and maybe Bryan has done some of you a favour!
They will not forgive and will not forget.
We interrupt this segment to remind you that Tabasco bought all of the Stargate tokens. If he bought all of the tokens… did he get an airdrop too? He can buy a new boat!
Frank took to the seas to serve as the lookout.
While on the topic of crypto businesses, here’s some flexing from Kyle Samani and Mason. Only inbound.
What’s a newsletter lately without some celebrity coverage? Just writing that sentence makes this feel like the top. Waka Flocka Flame doesn’t vibe with crypto twitter.
Why you ask? Well, he got ZachXBT’d.
There’s a lesson here.
If you bought SEXYY you had around 20 minutes to sell before the rug would be pulled right from under you. RIP.
Who needs celebrities when we have the likes of Cobie. He’s still busy wage cucking.
But who would win in this next match up?
Ansem is trying to move away from the celebrity coins and is getting back to telling you if you should go 50x long or short.
He looks like he is on his stimulants arc now.
At a stretch, Hayden could be called a main character. Is he spicy enough for that? He wants the SEC to get off Uniswap’s back.
Okay, maybe Hayden is becoming a little spicier with time. He now has beef with Mich. The only logical next step is to throw on some gloves and get in the ring.
This is the future of finance.
For additional Curve commentary and plenty more insights, we suggest you check out the latest episode of Steady Lads!
In Terra news, they have had their settlement approved. Do Kwon is still rekt though. He’s stuck in Montenegro as the courts decide if he should be extradited to the US or South Korea.
We round this off with a post that may age very well or extremely poorly. Was the writing on the wall?
And that's all for this week! See you next time.
Team Shitcoin.com