Newsletter #313 - Uptober Cancelled

Hey Shitcoiners,

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It has been a week of two halves. In this week’s newsletter we have both sides of the story and plenty of other shenanigans to share!

Before we get into that, be sure to check out the latest episode of Wage Cucking With Jmo. He caught up with Halloween 2008 from HarryPotterObamaSonic10Inu and Jimbo from Milady Maker.

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As we headed into a new month, “Uptober” was on the agenda. Will October 2024 be the start of the next bullrun?

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It looked like we were poised for lift off.

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Would our exit liquidity finally be back?

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Bitlord was having heart palpitations.

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Supposedly it is now time to lock the fuck in.

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The timeline was getting hornier with every green candle.

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However, the bullish sentiment would soon be a thing of the past as the Middle East conflict heated up. Our bags would suffer. As would Gainzy.

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He will not be taken out.

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Look, no one is saying that Israel is ruining Uptober, but…

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Hyperliquidated.

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Does this sound familiar, anon?

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In other news, CZ was released this week!

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But his re-entry into society was not the bullish event that everyone had hoped for.

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We haven’t seen any photos yet but we can only hope that CZ has become a jacked beast during his time inside.

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Even if he doesn’t come out looking like he’s on steroids, at least he was raking in the cash!

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We will just leave this prison joke here.

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If you are looking to stay on the straight and narrow while working in this space, there is likely no cushier job than working at the Ethereum Foundation. Where do we sign up?

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There is one way to earn an even easier living than that though. You could have just shorted the ETH ETF announcement.

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Are you risk maxxing yet?

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If you are already full porting memecoins Trump may be about to pump your bags. He’s really trying his best to win your vote.

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We are excited for a Moo Deng post from Trump in the near future.

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The hiring team at every zoo is now inundated with applications from scrawny basement dwellers. This timeline is wild.

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Meanwhile, the hiring teams at every crypto business are sifting through applications and unknowingly hiring DPRK IT workers. RIP.

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Enough bleak content, back to feeling wholesome. Taiki is going teetotal for a few months!

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But he is still paying for everyone at his events to indulge. What a champ. That’s a much better turn out than last time.

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We round this one off with a Gwart post. Enjoy.

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That's all for this week. See you next time.

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Team Shitcoin.com